30 November 2007

"Angry Little Elf"

Debbie this one's for you!

So this is a funny story! First things first I don't like to be touched by stragers! WHO DOES? I know for a fact my older sister avoided an entire grocery store because the check out people were creepy and touched her kids. Not in a bad way, but again who wants to be man handled? I honestly can't blame then though because her kids are seriously so cute.

So anyway, I was at a devotional at my Bishops house. We were standing around chatting with some friends. Chelsea a friend of ours had come with this guy who is in our ward. She didn't really know him but he asked her she wanted to go together and thus there we were.

Well on this particular day I was suffering from some sort of allergic situation in my eye. I joked that I had pink eye, some people looked at me like I was a leper and other chuckled with a bit of doubt. All in all my left eye was leaking pretty constantly and it didn't help that those whom I was with are HI-larious and the laughter made it worse. Well this fellow, for lack of a more tackful thing to call him was loud. We are loud we but we are funny. I don't even know how to describe him, the things he would say were so off the wall, phrases I had never heard before but they had a distinct air of fluffy bunnies, or a stylist from a gay sitcom. Can you picture it? Good. Well out of no where he came up to me and touched my EYE! My friend Connie said I look liked i coiled back to punch him in the face. She said she literally thought I was going to punch him, and was almost waiting in anticipation. I freaked out and raised my voice to say "what the", "you don't touch a strangers eye", i may have thrown in there " oh well now you have pink eye!" and in my rant I'm sure I said some other stuff.

Well he didn't really know what to do with me then. Certainly he wasn't expecting such a reaction just like I didn't expect him to touch me in the eye. Somewhere in there he shrinked off like a character in a cartoon who has just been crushed by an anvil and has instantaneously been transformed in to a walking accordian (that's how I imagined it in my mind at least). And we continued our conversation. Minutes passed and he returned literally like a dog with his tail between his legs head down barely making eye contact, and asked if I hated him. I take no pleasure in his demeaner only that it just made no sense that he would care since I most certainly had forgotten about the incident. That being said, let me pose this question; Is it possible to hate someone you don't even know? No, But I most certainly have added him to my list and told him as much. It's so unfortunate that this list even exists because in all sincerity I am a friendly person who would rather avoid someone, then offend them by being honest or fake to them but some situations we just can't avoid. Fair enough

Well I can't remember the exact events that followed but my friends and I continued our previous conversations whatever they were and someone asked who we hang out with in the ward or something to that effect. We dropped the few names of the people we were friends with who were almost all there and the next thing I know my "friend" the Giant said something to the effect of "well maybe more people would talk to you if you weren't an ANGRY LITTLE ELF". I laughed so hard both my eyes were leaking. Brent and Chelsea had their mouths gaping open in disbelief. They couldn't understand why I was laughing and not offended. A) I don't know this yawho from adam, who cares, B) he creatively and on the Sabbath called me a "B" and last but certainly not least all the other events that occured that led up to this moment were to much for me to handle and I laughed. I guess I'm short so that was a logical point in his labeling so cudos for creativity. If my life were a sitcom I believe this phrase would have been the next big catch phrase. Everyone would be calling everyone angry little elves and with the Holidays fast approaching imagine the pun's we could have enjoyed.

Yes if only my life were a sitcom!


. said...

Yes- there is laughter and a little eye leakage involved right now. Can I second your 'WHAT THE?' Seriously! Oh and the creapy checker is retiring in december, so yeah i can shop again!

Russ and Debbie said...

Oh thank you my angry little elf.

Connie Onnie said...

Picture if you will, Will Ferrel holding his arms out to you for a hug and saying "look at you" who does not love an angry little elf?