I have been writing lots and lots lately emailing myself ideas, thoughts, concerns, questions that need study, prayer and resolve. It has been a strange time, full of unexpected change, busy with learning how to relax, how to let go of things (and people in some instances) that i have no control over, understanding myself and who I am as an individual, who i am as a wife, daughter, daughter in law, grand-daughter in law, niece, sister etc. There is so much that i have left undone and so much that i fell a desire to do and understand.
The paths to get where i want to go are innumerable, and being blazed as I write this and some have yet to be discovered. Maybe it is as a labyrinth? Or perhaps just a big open road with forks and sharp turns and divides and paths such as those left by army’s of ants in there vigilant pursuit of food and survival. Knowing that there is someplace to be, somewhere we are going and not just wandering round and round in a spiraling dizzy does in fact bring a brief sense of peace. I’ve discovered for myself that constant peace means constantly seeking, developing oneself, mind and intellect, body and soul. I am striving in earnest for balance with all aspects of self and deity. I hope to find my way back to these pages from time to time opening closed doors and windows to let some light in and anyone willing to enter in.